by Herman Gooden (London Free Press)

It looks like there's a future for Roman Catholic bashing on the silver screen after all. A scurrilous little flick called Dogma has been kept out of commercial release the better part of a year because no U.S. distributor was willing to handle something so certain to offend Catholics and Christians generally.

Canadian distributor, Lions Gate, announced at the Toronto International Film Festival this week they had no such qualms.

"We think we've got a very funny film and we're releasing it," said vice-president, Peter Waal, also speculating that any notoriety will only help out at the box office.

This could cement Lions Gate's reputation as courageous risk-takers with an eye for worthwhile art films, as displayed in their promotion of two of last year's dark horse Oscar contenders, Gods and Monsters, and Affliction. Or it could confirm Lions Gate's other reputation as insensitive celluloid bottom-feeders who'll try to squeeze a buck out of anything; a distinction they earned by producing the film version of Paul Bernardo's favourite novel, the violent, American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis.

Lions Gate hopes to screen Dogma in about 1,000 Canadian and U.S. theatres this fall. Among blasphemous and/or anti-Catholic touches viewers of this little gem can expect to enjoy are:

- a direct descendant of Mary and Joseph (so much for Mary's virginity), who is the new saviour of the world (so much for Christ's second coming) and just happens to work at an abortion clinic (so much for the Catholic commitment to the pro-life cause)

- a black, 13th disciple who complains of being cut out of Bible narratives because the other apostles were racists (so much for the Christian apostolic mission to serve all peoples of the world)

- a giant "poop monster" (poop/pope -- get it?)

- and a pair of avenging angels on a killing spree, who exploit a loophole in Catholic dogma that guarantees them seats in Heaven (so much for the sixth commandment).

American film-maker, Kevin Smith, who wrote and directed Dogma, hopes to silence those who question the wisdom or value of ridiculing the beliefs of Catholics by pointing out he is a practising Roman Catholic himself.

"It was, from first to last, always intended as a love letter to both faith and God almighty," Smith has said about his film. "I'm pro-Catholic and I think the movie proves that."

Wow. Smith may not be lying, but he certainly is being disingenuous here.

Many Catholics find a way to stay in the church while disagreeing with one or two dogmatic points, but when you've rejected or mocked as many central tenets of the faith as he has, the only honest thing to do is to excuse yourself from the Catholic community and find another church that affirms your beliefs. Smith knows how hard it would be to mock liberalized denominations, which stand for little more than pleasantness and niceness, so he goes after the most conspicuous bearer he can find of traditional Christian standards -- the Catholic Church and the Pope.

Whether there's a market for Dogma's brand of cinematic blasphemy remains to be seen. All the reviews I've seen dismiss it as second-rate and tiresome. Roger Ebert suspects it will mystify most views and that "non-Catholics should be issued a catechism at the theatre door."

My own best-case scenario is that Catholics won't go to have their faith insulted, and non-Catholics won't go because they won't care.

G.K. Chesterton identified blasphemy as an artistic effect which only works when a society has widely shared philosophical convictions.

"Blasphemy depends upon belief and is fading with it," he observed 94 years ago. "If anyone doubts this, let him sit down seriously and try to think blasphemous thoughts about Thor. I think his family will find him at the end of the day in a state of some exhaustion."

Here's hoping Lions Gate loses a pile.