San Bernadino Sun: “Jason Mewes Doing It Clean And Sober”

“…The big difference this time was I was waking up early and looking forward to working. And I’d hang out after.”

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CanMag: “Smith on Clerks II”

“…Jason Lee, we got lucky because Jason was able to make time in his very busy Earl schedule for that scene and that was something that originally Matt [Damon] was going to do, but then Matt was off shooting a Robert DeNiro movie and so Jason stepped in and thankfully pulled it off.”

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E! Online: “Kevin Smith on Clerks II” (**SPOILERS**)

What do you think about being the screenwriter for Aquaman 2 on Entourage?

“I think they owe me a part now. They’ve taken two shots at me–one last season, one this season. Now, I think I should show up on the actual f–kin’ show and slap Ari Gold.”

An Afternoon with Kevin Smith
Date: September 23rd, 2006
Location: Central Florida
Venue: Orange County Convention Center, West Building
Price: $35.00

GMA’s Siegel storms out of ‘Clerks II’ screening

Maybe it’s because he has to wake up so early. Or maybe he just doesn’t like Kevin Smith.

Either way, one thing’s certain: “Good Morning America” film critic Joel Siegel really, really hates “Clerks II,” set to open Friday at theaters across the country.

Sitting in the front row of a packed midtown Manhattan screening room Monday night, Siegel dramatically stood up only 30 minutes into the film and stormed out, to the amazement of those in attendance.

And he didn’t go quietly.

“Time to go!” he yelled as he stood up and proceeding to walk out, passing dozens of critics and writers on his way to the door. And his tirade continued all the way out, as he yelled over the film’s dialogue that this was the first time “in thiry (expletive) years” he had walked out on a film.

The apparent reason for Siegel’s vulgar outburst? A line of dialogue in the film – well, one of many, actually – about sex between a woman and a donkey. Later in the screening, one other unnamed critic appeared to make an early departure.

Only time will tell what Siegel has to say about the episode on “GMA” this Friday.

CRITIC FLEES ‘SMUT’ SCREENING

DON’T joke about women, donkeys and bestiality if you expect Joel Siegel to watch your movie. That’s what director Kevin Smith found out when the pun-loving “Good Morning America” film critic stormed out of a press screening of Smith’s “Clerks II,” which opens Friday – an act that’s sparked a vicious war of words between the two.

“Time to go!” roared Siegel to his fellow critics. “First movie I’ve walked out of in 30 [bleeping] years!” His tirade came 40 minutes into the long-awaited Weinstein Company sequel to Smith’s 1994 cult classic about two foul-mouthed Long Island convenience store clerks who razz customers and goof off.

In the scene that sent Siegel to the exit, the characters graphically discuss hiring a woman to perform sexual favors on a donkey. Siegel told Page Six: “It was so foul and mean and repulsive. I finally realized I could not say anything positive . . . I wasn’t ready for this kind of smut . . . I hope he doesn’t make any more movies.”

An apoplectic Smith fired back on his MySpace blog: “Getting a bad review from Siegel is like a badge of honor. This is the guy who stole his mustachioed-critic shtick from Gene Shalit years ago, and still refuses to give it back. This is a guy who seemingly prides himself on his own nyuk-nyuk wordplay. For ‘Pirates 2,’ he made us all titter with ‘Yo, Ho, Ho and a Bottle of Fun’ . . . He made us squeal with delight when he wrote, ‘Wheelie Good Time for “Cars.” ‘ I mean, Fozzy [bleeping] Bear laughs at this guy.”

And there’s more: “I don’t need Joel Siegel to [bleep] my [bleep] the way he apparently [bleeps] M. Night Shyamalan’s, gushing over his flick [‘The Lady in the Water’] before he’s even seen it, but [bleep] man, man – how about a little common [bleeping] courtesy? You never, never disrupt a movie, simply because you don’t like it. Cardinal rule of moviegoing: Shut your [bleeping] mouth while the movie’s playing.

“I don’t come down to your job and slap the taste out of your mouth for coming up with a line like, ‘ “Shark Tale” Is a Halibut Good Time’ – so don’t [bleep] with my stuff while it’s still screening . . . What are you, a 12-year-old boy cutting loose with your pals at a Friday night screening of ‘Scary Movie’ 4′ while your parents are in a theater down the hall watching ‘The Devil Wears Prada’? Leave the diva-like behavior and drama-queen antics to the movie stars, not the movie reviewer, ya’ rude-ass [bleep].”

A Dick in a Mustache is Still Just a Dick

So last night, at a press screening of “Clerks II” in New York City, “Good Morning America” movie critic Joel Siegel decided he’d had enough of my shenanigans, and walked out of the flick at the forty minute mark. You’d imagine this would bother me, and yet, I’m as delighted by this news as I was with the eight minute standing ovation “Clerks II” received in Cannes.

I mean, it’s Joel Siegel, for Christ’s sake. As Paul Thomas Anderson once said of the man, getting a bad review from Siegel is like a badge of honor. This is the guy who stole his mustachioed critic shtick from Gene Shalit years ago, and still refuses to give it back. This is a guy who seemingly prides himself on being “punny” – that is, he likes to add his own nyuk-nyuk wordplay into the reviews he writes/gives.

For “Pirates 2”, he made us all titter with “Yo, Ho, Ho and a Bottle of Fun”.

For Pixar’s lastest, he made us squeal with delight when he wrote “Wheelie Good Time for ‘Cars’”.

Can you believe he somehow not only made us laugh, but also think, when he challenged our perception with “X-Men’ Fails to X-cite”?

I mean, Fozzy fucking Bear laughs at this guy (AT, mind you, not WITH).

So while I feel like my life will be a little bleaker now that I’ll never know what pun Joel would’ve dug deeply into his comedic well to produce for “Clerks II” (”‘Clerks II?’ More like ‘Jerks, Too’!”), I’ve gotta admit that I’m relieved somebody was finally offended by the flick – enough to head for the exit less than an hour in. I was beginning to think I was losing my touch.

I can’t fault Mr. Siegel for feeling “revolted” (his producer’s description of Joel’s reaction) by our flick; in truth, there is a donkey show in it, and I recognize that brand of whimsy might not be for everybody. Film appreciation is very subjective, and maybe Joel just isn’t into ass-to-mouth conversations.

However, I CAN fault him for the manner in which he left the screening.

Apparently, rather than quietly exit, both Joel and his Cum-Catcher (my slang for the fancy kind of mustache he sports) made a big stink about walking out, calling as much attention to himself as possible, and being generally pretty disruptive.

Check this shit out: roughly forty minutes into the flick, when Randal orders up the third act donkey show, Siegel bellowed to his fellow critics “Time to go!” and “This is the first movie I’ve walked out of in 30 fucking years!”

Now, I don’t need Joel Siegel to suck my dick the way he apparently sucks M. Night’s, gushing over his flick before he’s even seen it; but shit, man – how about a little common fucking courtesy?Never mind the fact that when you’re paid to watch movies for a living and the only tasks required of you are to a) sit through said movies and b) write your thoughts about them before your deadline, walking out before a movie’s over is pretty unprofessional. Never mind the fact that the scene he was offended by (the ordering of the donkey show), with its (misleading) crude references is only the set-up to a third act pay-off that is a true bait-and-switch from where Joel’s imagination went (and if you’ve already seen the flick, you KNOW what I’m talking about). Never mind that this dude is so straight-laced in his tastes and hyperbolic in his praise that when The Onion took a poke at Joel, I was almost unsure whether it was a joke or not…

You never… NEVER disrupt a movie, simply because you don’t like it.

Cardinal rule of movie-going: shut your fucking mouth while the movie’s playing. They even ask you to do so in the pre-show run-up to every flick (”Cell phones and pagers off, no talking during the show”). This guy went beyond talking, even; he was making a spectacle of himself as he left. I’ve now spoken to three folks in attendance last night, and all have said that Siegel WANTED everyone to know how disgusted he was, and that he was leaving. If you want to share your displeasure with everyone, that’s fine, dude; just do it AFTER the movie, not during. Some folks were enjoying themselves. I don’t come down to your job and slap the taste out of your mouth for coming up with a line like “‘Shark Tale’ Is a Halibut Good Time”; so don’t fuck with my stuff WHILE IT’S STILL SCREENING.

Shit, Joel, I know you like being on camera and all, but was it so difficult to not be the center of attention for 40 minutes that you just had to sparkle, Neely, sparkle-it up for your peers instead of showing them a little goddamn courtesy by leaving the theater the way most people do, either during or after the picture: quietly? What are you, a twelve year old boy, cutting loose with your pals at a Friday night screening of “Scary Movie 4” while your parents are in a theater down the hall watching “The Devil Wears Prada”? Leave the diva-like behavior and drama-queen antics to the movie stars, not the movie reviewer, ya’ rude-ass prick.

It makes me laugh to think that, had Joel stayed ’til the end (like any good critic would for any movie they’re paid to watch), he would’ve seen that we weren’t going where he seemed to think we were going. But apparently, Joel took a cue from his own “Poseiden” review, in which he wrote “Audiences today wouldn’t stand for an hour of exposition before the flood hit. In fact, they wouldn’t stand; they’d walk out.” Well, Magnum (y’know – because of the mustache), I guess you’re a member of that same audience that can’t stand exposition.

Look, I don’t hate the guy. Shit, I’m glad he survived his fairly recent bout with cancer. But his behavior in that screening was unconscionable and professionally unethical, not to mention childishly disruptive. And while I might get laughed at for saying this… well, I just expected more from Joel Siegel.

*sigh*

Rosario Dawson on “Live With Regis & Kelly” (6:40) CONTAINS SPOILER IN CLIP!

Rosario Dawnson on Conan O’Brien (Part One) (4:59)

Rosario Dawnson on Conan O’Brien (Part Two) (7:41)

Clerks II TV Commercial (0:14)

Chicago Tribune – “I read the news today, oh boy”

“… Smith is glad he took Mosier’s advice because he’s happy with how the movie came out, and no critic will convince him otherwise. Still, he says, “I’ll read every review, and the bad ones will kind of bug me to some degree, only in as much as I wish they liked it as much as me.”

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Hartford Courant – “The Dude Behind `Clerks II’” (**CONTAINS SPOILERS**)

“…Oddly enough, you end up making it under the radar even if you are tagging on a sacred cow,” Smith says. “People put a lot more attachment on the original than we ever did. We didn’t set out to make a cult classic or seminal indie film. We just wanted to make a movie about dudes sitting around talking again. This is probably a more realistic take on embracing adulthood, even if there is a donkey show.”

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Philadelphia Weekly – “Silent Bob Speaks”

“…Sometimes I wish I could be like every other filmmaker. I’ll talk to Robert [Rodriguez] and Quentin [Tarantino], and those dudes never read the fuckin’ Internet. They tell me to just look at the box office returns. But we don’t make these things in a vacuum. We make ‘em for people to see. I fell in love with the Internet because the idea of finding out what a guy in the middle of the country—a guy that I’ll never meet—to find out what that dude thinks about the movie. That’s fascinating to me.”

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OnMilwaukee.Com – “‘Clerks’ ring up second hilarious movie” (**MINOR SPOILERS**)

“…Hilarious scenes are abundant, but 99 percent of the movie is too vulgar to be mentioned here in detail, but it’s funny. When you think Smith has pushed the jokes too far, guess again. He’ll keep pushing and his wit is unmatched. Smith’s fans won’t be disappointed.”.

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New City Chicago – “Kevin Smith returns to Oz” (**CONTAINS SPOILERS**)

“…Smith cites the “Wizard of Oz” again in the film’s surprisingly loving, lovely ending, which I won’t give away. “Both of them, to me, occur to me as incredibly heroic,” Smith says of how it all turns out. “It’s not heroic like Wolverine popping his claws and taking out Jean Grey, it’s that quiet heroism of somebody doing something that never in a million years you would expect them to do and arriving at that conclusion themselves. I just love it. It really works for me, man. That’s the movie. All the other stuff is scenery.”

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ScrippsNews – “Review: Smith rings up more brilliance with ‘Clerks II’” (**CONTAINS SPOILERS**)

“…Detractors may say Smith is stuck in his own immature, fan-boy time warp. But he has matured, and so have the characters. It isn’t a sea change; it’s an evolution that’s natural and respectful, in Smith’s totally disrespectful way. They’re still finding truth, but it’s age-appropriate truth.”

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Orange County Weekly – “An Open Letter To Kevin Smith” (**CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS**)

“…Though you packed your bags for L.A. years ago, I suspect your heart will always belong to Red Bank, and maybe that’s why Clerks II slips on as comfortably as a well-worn shoe. It is, I think, the best thing you’ve done in years—the funniest and the most genuine.”

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Toledo Blade – “Kevin Smith puts his indie stamp on many of his works”

“…In 12 years I’ve learned to tell a story better. I’m a sharper writer. If you look at Clerks now, there’s no plot. It’s just sketches. Clerks II has an arc. But at the same time I get an inordinate amount of people, be it fans or from financiers who say it’s time to step up and grow. I’m just like, don’t they get it? This is what I do. It’s not a matter of me learning to do something better. It’s me doing what I want to do.”

Outfest lauds ‘Gymnast,’ ‘Gay Bar’ with top honors

Ned Farr’s “The Gymnast” was named outstanding U.S. narrative feature and Malcolm Ingram’s “Small Town Gay Bar” was honored as outstanding documentary feature at Outfest 2006’s closing-night awards ceremony Sunday. The Los Angeles gay and lesbian film festival announced its 12th annual Film Competition Awards at the John Anson Ford Amphitheatre, where Bruce Vilanch hosted the ceremony, which preceded the closing-night film, Q. Allan Brocka’s “Boy Culture.” The grand jury also recognized Amnon Buchbinder’s “Whole New Thing” as outstanding international narrative feature. Brocka and Phillip Pierce took the screenwriting prize for “Boy Culture.” Acting honors went to Michael Carbonaro for “Another Gay Movie” and Diane Gaidry for “Loving Annabelle.”

We got there about an hour before curtains and there was already a line that went all the way to the end of the block. We waited for over an hour and a half to get in and then, the first thing to appear on screen was: Kevin Smith prisente ‘Les Commis en folie II’.

What the fuck is this, the dubbed version! Crap in a frigin hat! If it’s in French I’m storming out of here Joel Siegel style!

After a couple of seconds, we realized, to our great pleasure, that the film was only subtitled in French and very very poorly at that. (trust me, I’m French Canadian)

From [SPOILER REMOVED] to [SPOILER REMOVED], the movie was awesome. People were laughing, cheering and clapping. I even saw a guy wipe a tear from his eye after [SPOILER REMOVED]. You could hear the squirminess at the view of [SPOILER REMOVED].

All in all, the movie is excellent, the cast rocks and Kevin is just simply: The Man!

The Montreal premier is gonna be something we, ViewAskew fans, will remember for a long time (or until the next one comes along!)

But this being “View Askew,” while this event easily was the most typically “Hollywood” of the Kevin Smith premiere events I have attended (1999’s Dogma event and 2001’s Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back bash) in terms of location, size, and flair, there was a little twist. The quickly-filled Dome lobby was convincing visual evidence of the overbooked guest list, but the crowd was not heavily filled with famewhoring C- and D-listers who snagged a ticket hook-up by way of aggressive publicists; most of the faces were that of less-recognizable crew, cast, View Askew staffers, and friends. As trippy as it was to witness a sequel to Clerks to get a glitzy event treatment, it was fitting and refreshing to see that the capacity audience was no parade of party-hopping Us Weekly glamazons.

MSNBC – “Clerks II will more than satisfy Smith fans” (**CONTAINS SPOILERS**)

“…You’ll be shocked to learn that Dante and Randal are still doing the exact same thing: standing around all day at their menial jobs, finding ways to avoid work, and talking. And talking and talking. They’re just doing it in color instead of black and white”.

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Comic Book Resources – “Interview: Kevin Smith”

What was the genesis for the creation of this sequel?

I don’t! [laughs] I don’t know. I could point to any number of things. I really wanted to tell a story about what I thought it felt like it was like to be in my 30s. I tried to do that with “Jersey Girl,” and I think to some degree I think I was kind of successful in what I wanted to do, but at the same time it’s a movie that’s a bit manipulative and a bit mawkish and what not. So, I wanted to do a version of what I felt what it was like being in my 30s that was a little more in touch with reality, which is odd because this movie does have a donkey show at its epicenter. [laughs] So, that’s part of it and I thought that “Clerks” was a movie about what I felt it was like to be in my 20s, so I could use Dante and Randal as the way in and suddenly it became “Clerks II.”

I talked about doing the movie back in ‘98. In the tail end of the “Dogma” credits it says, “Jay & Silent Bob will return in ‘Clerks II: Hardly Clerking.’” Then I was like, “You know what man? Maybe I shouldn’t fuck with the sacred cow. Do a sequel to the first film? What if it sucks and people retroactively go back and hate on the first film. Perhaps it’s not the way to go.” And it became “Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back” instead. But all the ideas were there. The groundwork had been laid in my head, so that Dante and Randal story was always in the background. I figured one day I’d just do it in comic book form or something like that. Then, when I thought about telling the story, about what it’s like to be in my 30s, I was like, “Shit, that’s the story. It’s all coming together. It’s gelling.”

Some people online have said it’s obviously a reaction to “Jersey Girl,” the film didn’t do well and he went back to the well and he’s retrenching. They’ve missed the target, but hit the tree. “Jersey Girl” played a role, but it wasn’t that because I was already dialed into doing “Clerks II” while we were still working on “Jersey Girl.” While working on “Jersey Girl” I was just like, “Man, next movie I don’t want to work with famous people. I don’t want to work with celebrities. I want to work with unknowns. I don’t want to fucking worry about ‘In Touch Weekly’ or ‘Us Weekly’ putting them on their cover every fucking week.” It’s weird when you spend like two years of your life trying to put together and tell a story and then when you sit down to talk about it nobody wants to talk about the story, they just want to ask, “Did you see the pink diamond? Is it huge?” And I’m like, “Well, yeah, but what does that have to do with anything, man?” When the back story overshadows the story, it’s just not cool anymore. As a storyteller it’s kind of insulting. Either the movie is as bad as you say and you have nothing to talk about except these two, or you find these two more fascinating than the movie we put together. Either way you’re kind of screwed.

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Canmag – “Clerks II Racism” (**CONTAINS SPOILERS**)

“…That didn’t make it any easier for Jeff Anderson to perform the scene. “The weird thing, it’s like you’re going through the script and you’re reading the script, and you’re trying to memorize your dialogue,” said Anderson. “It’s like when you’re in the moment you have to get into that scene, your brain is telling you the whole time, ‘No, no, no, no, you don’t say this,’ but it is what it is.”

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About.com – “Trevor Fehrman Talks About Clerks II”

“…How I came up with this character… all I can say is a couple of the mannerisms came from a couple people I know. It’s sort of a cross between my friend Paul from Long Beach who’s like the best guy in the world, but people always think that I’m describing him as stupid. He’s not stupid. He’s smart. He’s an amazing drummer. He’s just one of those guys who’s very single-minded. He completely thinks something through before he moves onto the next thing. He does stuff in order. So whenever you explain something to Paul, he does this look where he goes like, ‘Oh, yeah. Oh yeah, I got you dawg.” So there’s a little bit of that in Elias, where he’s trying to wrap his mind around something.”

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WHIOTV – “Kevin Smith Counters Bennifer Disaster With ‘Clerks II’”

“…Fans of the iconic character of Jay will be buzzing over Mewes’ dizzying performance in “Clerks II.” Because of the actor’s burning intensity, Jay is funny — and scary — at the same time.

“There’s an edge to the dude and I think that’s what makes him funny. The fact is, you never know where’s he’s going to go with something,” Smith said.”