Kevin Smith Stuck in New Jersey

Red Bank, New Jersey, will get another two-hour advertisement from indie director Kevin Smith. Smith is currently readying Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back for a 2001 release. Smith has been quiet about the contents of this new film, but most reports agree that this film will seek to tie up all of the loose ends from Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy and Dogma. That means that we’ll be seeing not only a lot of repeat characters, but multiple roles for Smith regulars as well. For example, we could see Jason Lee as both Banky and Brodie. Details are sketchy, but fans of the View Askew universe can hardly wait.

” It’s got religious gags, sex gags, gay gags, youth-culture gags, body function gags and gags to make you gag. What writer/director/co-star Kevin Chasing Amy Smith’s rampagingly funny and irreverent satire didn’t have, when first released, was an audience. The time has come, then, to right this blasphemous wrong. Meet earth-bound bad-boy angels Loki and Bartleby (Matt Damon and Ben Affleck respectively), who have found a loophole in God’s law which will allow them to re-enter heaven. So abortion-clinic worker Linda Fiorentino, muse Salma Hayek and voice of God Alan Rickman are entrusted with the task of stopping them, avoiding killer skate-boarders and shit-demons as they go. US Catholic groups didn’t get the joke, but you certainly will, because, amazingly Smith’s film – one of the first he ever wrote – never stops being funny or inspired for a second. It’s one of the best things on TV this Yuletide. Watch it and you will believe! ”

“Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillipe may be the cutest young couple in Hollywood, but even they’ve got enemies. Clerks director Kevin Smith refers to Witherspoon as ‘Greasy Reese’ in a column he wrote for the web site Psycomic, explaining that Witherspoon was ‘condescending’ when they met in 1994 and was rude to his then girlfriend. More than six years later, Smith writes, he begged actor Selma Blair for the couple’s home address- ‘What could be better than whipping eggs at the home of a couple of B-listers?’- but she wouldn’t tell him, despite a half-hour of pleading.”

I had a case at the Bergen Couty Courthouse today in Hackensack (I’m a NJ attorney) and Affleck and crew took over the third floor as they were filming courtroom scenes.

Ben was being cordial (as usual) to all the passers by and spoke to a lady wearing a Juror button (real juror, not movie juror), shook her hand and told her to “go and do her civic duty”

The scene being film had Affleck and three other lawyers (one older, two younger) outside the courtroom door then at some point, they make their entrance into the courtroom. I couldn’t see what was going on inside, but the actors all would eventually make it back out to the hallway, only to wait to start over again.

David deadpans a lot. He’s a really funny and well-versed guy who I instantly love. There’s no bullshit about him – no pretentious air that makes most actors and actresses insufferable. And when the subject of The X-Files finally can no longer be avoided, he indulges my fanboy-ism-ness and suffers through my Chris Farley-like probings along the lines of “Remember that time when Mulder was trying to find the truth, ’cause it was out there? That was awesome!”. But I don’t beat the topic into the ground, because I know personally that cult roles have a way of haunting a motherfucker (ask me how many times people point at me in the mall and say “Fly, fat-ass, fly!” Mind you, I’m only assuming here that they’re reciting the line from Mallrats). Indeed, as we’re waiting for our cars outside the restaurant, a guy walks by, points and says “Whoa! X-Files!” Without missing a beat, Duchovny offers “This is my life.”

QUESADA vs. McFARLANE: THE NEXT GENERATION

This Time the Marvel Editor-in-Chief Kicks It Up a Notch!

Author: Michael Doran

Date: 12/19/00

Late last month in a series of letters and emails to the comics press and message board posts, Marvel’s Joe Quesada issued a very public challenge to creator Todd McFarlane. The crux of the challenge..? That McFarlane make some kind of return to comics penciling, with the idea/intent that a new high-profile project by one of the architects of the early 90’s boom would be of great benefit to the slumping market [for more on the original challege, see the December 1st Newsarama Weekly edition].

Quesada’s ‘call out’ garnered the attention of many readers, industry pundits and news sources such as Wizard Magazine. In addition, writer Peter David devoted an edition of his But I Digress column to the subject in a recent issue of Comics Buyer’s Guide; and ours truly contributed a reader poll asking how McFarlane should respond to the challenge, with 49% of over 1100 respondents agreeing the creator owed it to the industry to draw some new comics projects. Even McFarlane’s attention was grabbed, and he issued an early response on his own Spawn.com message boards, though essentially dismissing the matter.

After a few weeks of silence on the topic, Quesada is back at it, and this time upping the ante considerably. In an open letter to McFarlane – by way of Comics Newsarama – the Marvel editor-in-chief gets more proactive, and makes the Spawn creator and former Spider-Man artist an offer he can’t refuse… or at least one Quesada hopes he can’t.

“First I want to start by wishing everyone within earshot of this message a glorious and happy Holiday Season,” began Quesada. “I`ve been pretty naughty, so I`m not expecting more from Saint Nick than a couple of lumps of coal, but that`s not going to keep me from getting into the giving spirit! NOW, let`s get to the meat of this…

“Thank you, all of you who have swamped my electronic mail box with all of your letters of support and anticipation over the McFarlane challenge! Todd responded briefly and politely but basically went back into hiding. Now along with all the letters from fans dying to see this happen came several questions, let`s clear a few of them before I move on with this.

“Yes, my offer of $1000, later $1100, was absolutely spun off from Lorne Michaels offer to the Beatles way back in Saturday Night Live’s heyday. “Yes, I realize that Todd, doesn`t need the money and that $1000 ($1100) is a ridiculously low amount. It`s a goof!

“No, I wasn`t asking Todd to draw for Marvel, I was just asking for him to come back and draw!

“Was I joking, well, anyone who knows me knows that I wrote it with fun in mind. If I had just written a boring letter pleading ‘Gee, Mr. Toddy-woddy, would you pweeze come back and dwah somethin`, 90% of you wonderful folk reading it would have collectively said this…

‘SNOOOOORE!’

“So I was partially joking in tone, but deadly serious in intent. We`re in tough times now folks, but we don`t have to live there! I`m sick and tired of all the negativity that`s floating around the industry, the net, at conventions. It`s driving me nuts! I hear fans grumbling and even sadder I hear creators grumbling incessantly. It`s all negative this, negative that! Come on, it`s time to stop now! Stop with the griping and let`s look towards the future, go ahead, take a look, it looks pretty bright to me! I`m just trying to bring a little levity and get fans talking again. I can`t tell you how many message boards I`ve read were people actually think that I should be acting more like a suit! Now that made me laugh!!! Doesn`t anyone remember when it was okay to have fun in the comics industry? “Okay, getting back to the serious part of this.

“Toddster, this is my last and final offer. I`m going to make it as easy as possible. What I`m offering is that you draw a book and I draw a book. And just because no one thought that it could happen, let`s make it worth everyone`s while. Here`s my Holiday gift for ya, I`m talkin`…

…” SPIDER-MAN/SPAWN!!!”

“That`s right, you draw a Spidey/Spawny crossover for TMP and I draw one on the Marvel end. I say we make them 48-page one-shots! Maybe we`ll even have the fans vote on which one they like better!

“Now I`m not done yet, I`m starting to feel that Holiday spirit coming on strong!

“I put in a call to a writer friend of mine to see if he was interested in writing my end of it and he immediately accepted. Not only was he blown away by the whole ‘Get Todd penciling again’ idea, but the next day he e-mailed me a synopsis of the story cause he couldn`t stop thinking about it. It wasn`t bad for a beginner like Kevin Smith!

“Oh, there`s more and with the season of giving upon us I`m getting to the most important part of this challenge. I have recently agreed to be on the Board of Directors of the ACTOR Fund. ACTOR is “A Commitment To Our Roots,” a non-profit corporation dedicated to helping out old-time comic creators in financial need. Since many Golden Age or Silver Age creators toiled to build today`s groundwork by working only for page rate with no chance of ownership and no pension, this fund has been set up to help some of our elder statesmen in need.

“I`ll donate $10,000 of my proceeds from Spider-Man/Spawn as well as half of the artwork and Kevin (who looks considerably more like Santa than I do) has agreed to donate cash from the project as well.

“So what more could you ask for, Toddy Boy? I`m giving you the Wallcrawler to have some fun with and we`re looking to help an amazingly good cause. Let`s go over it one more time…

“1-SPIDER-MAN/SPAWN
2-KEVIN SMITH
3-$10,000 and half my artwork to ACTOR”

“Oh, and you get a $1100 check from me! “Now to all the fans who would like to see this happen, send Todd a note, go to Spawn.com and be heard. We want Todd to come back to what gave him his start. I would hate to think that he didn`t feel it was worth his time because there was nothing to be gained from it. “That`s it from me, once again I hope everyone has a wonderful Holiday Season and here`s looking forward to an amazing 2001 filled with great times, comics and who knows maybe a really cool Spider-Man/Spawn crossover! See ya in the funnybooks – JQ, EEK!”

In a follow-up conversation, Quesada assured Newsarama this is a genuine offer, and not just a publicity stunt…

“Kevin has already sent me a synopsis. If Todd agrees, we can start whenever he says go,” he replied. “Why would I make this up? The boss said I could do it…And, I am the boss, right? Plus, we`ve been getting so much press lately, it`s not like we need it. I really want to see the guy help us move the needle the same way Frank [Miller] is doing with his Dark Knight sequel.”

Where does it go from here?? Stayed tuned, you never know…

LAST WEEK’S QUESTION – FINAL RESULTS

The Academy has spoken and so have you, Steve Martin is officially in, but perhaps they’ll consider our soft-spoken winner as his tubby sidekick. Now that Billy Crystal has opted out, who do want to see as host of this year’s Academy Awards?

1. Silent Bob (25.9%)
2. Jim Carrey (20.8%)
3. Chris Rock (15.3%)
4. The Cast Of South Park (11.4%)
5. The Presidential Loser (10.2%)
6. Robert Downey Jr. (9.0%)
7. Dennis Miller (7.5%)