Those bad boys from “Clerks” are back.Jay and Silent Bob, those two loveable (and pathetic) characters fromwriter/director Kevin Smith‘s films, have been reborn as action figures.Graphitti Designs will unleash the two action figures on an unsuspectingworld this September, and just like the characters themselves, these toysare guaranteed to offend.

“These characters have great depth, although it’s not always sociallyacceptable stuff,” says Graphitti Designs President Bob Chapman. “Still,there’s a lot of fun to be had here. These charactersare being presentedin the same style they are in the films, so I think fans will get a kickout of them.”

Jay and Silent Bob first appeared in kevin Smith’s black-and-whiteindie film phenomenon “Clerks” as two worthless guys hanging out infront of a convenience store, talking trash and selling drugs.Subsequent appearances in Smith’s “Mallrats” and “Chasing Amy” have onlyincreased the characters’ popularity, leading to 11 MTV short films, aswell as their own comic books from Oni Press (Oni Double Feature #1 andan upcoming mini series). Now, with the action figures, Jay and SilentBob have truly hit cult status.

“It’s funny, because when [Clerks] played in theaters, it was like ahighbrow crowd, so in all the reviews, nobody ever really talked aboutJay and Slient Bob,” Smith says. “I never really felt the characters hadmuch of an impact, but I’d already written them into “Mallrats”regardless. When those characters came up onscreen, people justexploded, because clerks had gone to video at that point, so the secondaudience found that film, the audience who sit around and go, [inhaling]’Jay and Silent Bob rock!’, those kind of guys. There was just instantcharacter recognition.”

Graphitti designs assembled a crack team to turn Jay and Silent Bobinto action figures. Comics pro Matt Wagner (Grendel, Mage), whoillustrated the Oni Double Feature, created the initial designs. Afterthat, Graphitti enlisted the aid of top sculptor Norm DeCarlo. “Norm wasone of the primary sculptors on ‘Nightmare Before Christmas’ and ‘ToyStory’,” Chapman says. He brings some great credibility to the job; hehas impeccable credentials. Kevin’s seen [the figures], and he’s veryhappy.”

In order to make the toys as unique as the characters themselves,Graphitti Designs has pulled out all the stops. “we’re putting in voicechips,” chapman says, “so each character can have sound bites withthem.” Jay will have six different expressions, including “SnootchieBootchies” and “Naga-Noonch!” As for Silent Bob…well, in keeping withthe character’s stoic nature, Silent Bob will be appropriately silent.”It’ll be the talking Silent Bob figure,” Chapman laughs. “He’ll havethe button on his back, but say nothing.”

The action figures come fully loaded with tons of politically incorrectaccessories. Both characters feature interchangeable hands, Silent Bob’sholding an, er, illegal cigarette and Jay’s “flipping the bird.” SilentBob also comes with a six-pack of beer (with two cans missing), a cartonof smokes, a set of crash goggles and two sets of blueprints used in themovie “Mallrats.” The Jay figure will feature a stash baggie and waterpipe, as well as interchangeable T-shirt decals. “Krypto the dog willalso be an accessory,” Chapman says,”the dog from Oni Double Feature #1.He’s kind of tri-podding, with his front paws on the ground, but thenrather than his rear legs being on the ground, there’s something elsetouching instead. [laughs] We’re going to be in big trouble here!”

Chapman realizes that the nature of these action figures may alienatesome buyers, but he believes that most fans will respond favorably. “I’msure there’ll be some people who’ll give us a lot of crap for thesefigures,” Chapman admits, “But they’re fun, they’re in the same attitudethat the film characters are in, and if it offends people, I’m sorry.But you could have these or you could have more big-breasted women.What’s more offensive? At least these are the way they’re portrayed inthe movies. If you think these are offensive, cast your vote by whetheror not you buy them. I feel real good about these, and we’re going fullspeed ahead.

Byline reads : Scott Brick was not offended in any way while writing this story.Though he was slightly frightened by the dog. And has has absolutely noclue what “Snootchie bootchies” means.