BE: So is the “Clerks” animated film ever gonna happen, or are they waiting to see how well “Clerks 2” does on home video?

KS: No, I mean, if they had their druthers over at the Weinstein Company, it’d be done. But it’s just a matter of finding time to sit down and do it, and getting up the passion for it. I would hate to rush out there with something just because, “Well, ‘Clerks 2′ is out, let’s get this thing out there.” So once I have enough jokes and material, I think I’ll move forward.

BE: And what’s the status of “Ranger Danger and the Danger Rangers” and the so-called “Untitled Kevin Smith Horror Project”?

KS: I mean, the horror flick will go before “Ranger Danger.” “Ranger Danger” is something I want to wait on until I’ve got a few more years (of) experience and whatnot, but the horror movie I think we’re probably going to end up doing next. But I haven’t started writing that yet, either. “Clerks 2” was a real year-long process for me, of wrapping up and shooting and cutting and promoting and releasing and then working on the DVD. So, lately, I’ve just been hanging out, watching TV, playing Scrabble. I’ve been in the “entertain me” mode more than I’ve been in the “I will entertain” mode.

BE: Did you catch the “Smallville” episode last week, where they brought on Green Arrow?

KS: No! They asked me to be in that episode, too, but I couldn’t do it because I was out of town.

BE: I haven’t seen it yet, either, but I saw the preview and wanted to ask you about it.

KS: They asked me to play…I guess he robs a comic book store, and they asked me to be the guy who runs the comic book store, so I thought that was very sweet and I would’ve done it in a heartbeat, but I just couldn’t be there for it.

BE: So when are we going to see “Jersey Girl: The Extended Cut” on DVD? I know it’s been played at your annual Vulgarthon in New Jersey, so I figured we’d see it sooner than later.

KS: Yeah, I don’t know. Last year, we said to Buena Vista, “Can we put this out?” And they said, “Let’s wait a few years.” It would’ve been easier to do if Bob and Harvey were still at Miramax and that relationship still existed, but now, I really don’t have anyone over at Buena Vista that I’m tight with, so it’s much harder to make your case. Basically, they’re like, “‘Jersey Girl’? Why would we bother?” So, sooner or later, we will. I mean, at the end of the day, it moves good units for them. But they seem to be the only act in town who aren’t, like, “Yeah, man, fuck, let’s go again!” Like, Columbia/Tri-Star was, “Let’s do a ‘Dogma’ extended edition!” And I’m, “Really? We’ve already done two ‘Dogma’ DVDs.” But these cats are kind of dragging their heels.

Director Kevin Smith acting in Showtime pilot

Director Kevin Smith and British actor James Purefoy have joined the cast of the Showtime comedy pilot “Manchild.”

The project, based on a BBC series, revolves around a group of fortysomething male friends (Smith, Purefoy,John Corbett, Paul Hipp) who are knee-deep in midlife crises.

Smith will play Paul, the cynic of the group, an angry divorced guy who loathes himself, his ex and his ex’s perfect new husband.

Purefoy will play Joe, the ad hoc leader of his circle of pals. He is attractive, polished, virile and wealthy, goes to the hottest new clubs and doesn’t date anyone over 25.

If “Manchild” goes to series, it will mark Smith’s first regular primetime gig. He executive produced ABC’s short-lived animated series “Clerks,” based on his critically acclaimed indie feature. Onscreen, Smith is best known as Silent Bob, a character he has played in most of his movies, most recently in “Clerks II.”

Purefoy stars as Mark Anthony on the HBO series “Rome,” which is wrapping production on its second and final season. His feature credits include “Vanity Fair,” “Resident Evil” and “A Knight’s Tale.”

Mooby’s Fun Meal box and contains: Clerks 2 Collector’s Edition, Mooby’s drink cup, Mooby’s Name Tag and Mooby’s Funployee Logo Visor. The back panel of the box with all of the games includes: a. aMAZEing fun (you guessed it, it’s a maze) b. Mooby’s sing-a-long c. Mooby’s Mega Word Search d. Connect the dots (connect the dots and it becomes a “leaf”) Writer-director Kevin Smith returns to the scene of his cult comedy classic Clerks to pick up his nothing-is-sacred style of humor…and push it right over the edge! Ten years after the original, slacker heroes Dante (Brian O’Halloran) and Randal (Jeff Anderson) have become “funployees” at Mooby’s fast food. In addition to offending customers and debating anything and everything, their responsibilities now include ragging on their uber-nerd co-worker (Trevor Fehrman) and teasing their sexy manager (Rosario Dawson). But when Dante announces his plan to leave New Jersey, Randal plots a shocking and hysterical going-away party that will alter their lives forever. Featuring cameos by Ben Affleck, Jason Lee, Wanda Sykes, and the triumphant return of Jay and Silent Bob.

…If it’s any consolation, I almost had a run-in with some criminal activity as well.

On our way to the car after the event, Jen, Chay and I picked up a tail: two junkie-looking fucks who took an interest in our turn into the dark alley masquerading as the lot where we were parked. With one of the dudes hanging back a bit as lookout, the other guy picked up his pace heading toward us, while at the opposite end of the alley, two other guys started making their way toward our vehicle as well. I’m generally not the paranoid type, but this definitely felt like a turkey shoot. As I hurried the ladies to the car, I pressed the alarm button on my keychain, which starts the repeated honking and flashing lights cycle… and calls a great deal of attention to the vehicle. This startled our predators enough to slow their pace, and we piled into the car, as the dudes at the other end of the alley started yelling “What the fuck?!” – either at us or the two dudes behind us who’d now stopped cold. Doors slammed and locked, I did a General Lee out of that lot, rocketing by a pair of ratty looking fuckers who offered us pretty pissed (and disappointed) expressions.

Y’know how, from time to time, you get that “Something bad’s about to happen here” feeling? Like there’s some kind of buried instinct that starts screaming at you in moments of possible impending peril? This was most definitely one of those times. No weapons were brandished, mind you; but I got the distinct impression that our trio was a cunt-hair away from being introduced to the business-end of something… not very nice. For years, I always wondered why Ford included that forced alarm button on the keys to the Expedition; like, who’d want to set their car alarm off on purpose? Now I get it.

If you’re heading over to the event this evening, please make sure you park in a very well-lit area. Hollywood at night is about as dangerous as any other city – which means that if you stay on the road and off the moors, you should be fine. But just the same, since the event will, more than likely, get out late, I’d suggest staying alert on your way back to your car/hotel. Never forget that there are some desperate (or just flat-out evil) people in the world, and they’re always looking for a pigeon/easy mark.

And, yes: I can appreciate the utter irony in that last sentence, considering I was on my way home from an event where I was charging fifty bucks to sit around and watch some DVD extras.

What was “Hating Hal” about? Is it true that it was about a comic book guy who was to be played by Jason Lee? Has Kevin ever thought about trying to get it going again?

Kevin says: “I have, actually. Lately, I’ve been thinking of pitching it to another network. This was something Jason Lee and I developed, so I’d have to get his okay on it as well, but it’s not something he’d want to act in anymore. There was a tiny window post ‘Rats’ and pre-‘Amy’ when Lee was okay with the idea of doing a tv show. That window has long-since closed, and with good reason: Carsey/Werner, the folks who asked us to do a show, didn’t react very favorably to the show we wanted to do, and Lee reacted even less favorably to the shows they presented him with.”

Incidentally, ‘Hating Hal’ wasn’t what we worked on. We presented ‘Hiatus’, about a small-town guy who went to Hollywood to become and actor, wound up doing a lot or porn, then opted to leave the life behind and go back home to open a comic book store. The notion behind ‘Hating Hal’ (which was all mine) was something that was going to be incorporated into ‘Clerks 2′.

“Director Kevin Smith described Jesus as a black man in his 1999 film “Dogma,” with Chris Rock playing a black apostle whose story was erased from biblical canon by the church.”

Man comes back to small home town after years of being away in California living a double life as a porn star. once back at home he decides to use the money he made to open a comic book store, all while trying to keep his family and townsfolk under the radar to exactly what he was doing while away on “hiatus”.

“Having watched the original Evening with Kevin Smith, and then finally seeing Kevin Smith in person at the Clerks 2 Melbourne premiere, I thought to myself “I could listen to this guy talk about anything for an unlimited amount of time”. That’s not an exaggeration. Evening Harder continues the trend of fascinating conversation, there’s no gap between Evening With and Evening Harder. Just like a good sequel, plots are mentioned from the first one, loose ends are tied up and there are updates on the fall out of events.

Evening Harder had a tough task of maintain the freshness and spontaneity of the first one, but Kevin never tires the audience out and keeps everything moving at a great pace from Toronto to London. His fantastic story about Dora the Explorer is one of the highlights and had myself tuning in to the kids show for a laugh. The opening in London is hilarious as Kevin himself proves to be even more of a foul mouth, gutter talker as he throws the C word out like it’s the new “google”. After watching his Evening DVD’s, and seeing him live on stage, one thing becomes clear: He doesn’t treat his audience with contempt. He doesn’t patronise them. He puts up with a lot and in the end comes across as a genuine bloke. There’s too much to report on and so much to discover about this wonderful collection of conversations. In Australia, we got 2 for the price of half a 1. Both Evening are packaged together for $27AU. I would have paid much much more for it.”

Marketing Dilemma: How To Promote a Film Called ‘F***’?

How can a studio promote and market a film whose title is the F word? That is the challenge facing ThinkFilm, which is releasing F**k the movie in New York and Los Angeles on Nov. 10 before expanding it. Bloomberg News quoted ThinkFilm’s marketing chief, Mark Urman, as describing his quandary this way: “Newspapers, unless they are alternative weeklies, cannot print the word … and movie theaters cannot put the title on a marquee.” Another complication facing the company — the title of the movie would also force the MPAA ratings board to issue an NC-17 rating; ThinkFilm has therefore decided to release it unrated. However, Mark Cuban’s Landmark Theatre Corp. has reportedly agreed to exhibit it in 57 theaters in 23 markets.

When Silent Bob speaks, the Hawaiian press listens

This year’s Maverick Awards ceremony was held at the Halekulani Hotel in Waikiki. Prior to the start of the ceremony, reporters were preparing their cameras. My Mom talked to some people, shook hands, had me do the same, and then sat down in the audience. In front of us stood a woman who was being paid to smile and ask us how our day was. She turned to me, smiled, and asked how my day was. I sat down in my seat and tried to think of a good question.

Every time someone entered the room, I would look over to see who it was. Finally, a man walked up the sidewalk. Mom nudged me and said “That’s him.”

“What?,” I thought. “This seemingly awkward man with spiky hair is my idol Silent Bob? He’s… different!”

Mr. Smith sat down, wiped his brow, and was announced by Christian Razukas of the Hawaii International Film Festival. “Please welcome, Kevin Smith!” There was applause and cameras flashed as Kevin waved a bit.

Christian explained that ” … Mr. Smith is the second-ever winner of the Maverick award. These awards are designed for people like him, brilliant and with different ways of thinking.”

After Mr. Razukas finished his introduction, Silent Bob finally spoke: “Hi. Tip of the day: Don’t bring a fat man who likes to wear layers to Hawaii. Don’t you guys have a cold season?”

This comment was then followed by much laughter from the reporters in the audience. You see, this is Hawaii’s cold season.

Kevin’s response when he was told this? “Holy $#!+.”

As part of this press conference, several reporters asked Mr. Smith what he thought about all of the comic books that had recently been turned into movies. Kevin replied by saying that ” … I get offered a lot of comic book movies but I usually turn them down ’cause I like watching those, not directing them. I make films with two guys talking about #######. If I made (big-budget comic book movies), then I can’t make fun of them anymore.”

Speaking of making fun of comic book movies, Kevin talked about Ben Affleck’s 2003 film, “Daredevil” and how — whenever Smith gets into a fight with Affleck these days — he says “Hey, go put on your red tights!”

Kevin also talked about the two comic book stores that he owns, one in Los Angeles & one in New Jersey.

Speaking of Southern California, Smith said that he was very honored that Knotts Berry Farm was killing Silent Bob as part of this year’s Hanging. “We filmed Clerks 2 right there in that city, what’s it called? Yeah, Buena Park, during the Haunt last year, and then this year … I’m really glad they used my characters without my permission. I think that’s totally cool.”

Kevin was then asked about Asian directors, as HIFF focuses mostly on Asian film. “I was wondering what the ####, I’m the only white person here!” he said, then talked about he really loves Ang Lee. Who Smith considers American, given that this director can do so many different things.

Making fun of his own directorial limitations, Kevin said that “… You know what you’re going into when you see a Kevin Smith film.”