“Pal Joey” by Kenneth M. Chanko
Appeared in the Summer 1999 issue of “Unlimited”

I’m here at the no-frills House of Pies coffee shop in Los Angeles with JoeyLauren Adams, the Arkansas-born-and-bred beauty who relieved Bud Bundy ofhis virginity (in Married….With Children), was pursued by Ben Affleck (inChasing Amy), and danced with the angelic John Travolta (in Michael). Whilethis 28-year-old actress has certainly enjoyed Hollywood success, she’s nowbraced for her biggest break yet- playing opposite Adam Sandler in thissummer’s Big Daddy. Joey, excuding Southern comfort in a pair of old jeansand a plain sweater -shirt, chose our meeting spot because, as she puts it,”The last thing I wanted to do was go to one of those places where everyone’s wearing sunglasses and talking on their cellphones”. Don’t expect to bumpinto her at the trendiest Hollywood club-your more likely to find Joeyworking on her vintage ’68 Firebird. “I have a girlfriend who rebuilds herown transmissions,” she says. “I can’t do that, but I have changed my ownbrake shoes.”

Kenneth Chanko (KC): So this ’68 Firebird of yours, is it in tip-top shape?

Joey Lauren Adams (JLA): Well not really. I don’t have the right equipment.It took me all day to change the shoes because I didn’t have the specialtool to take off those hard springs. Anyway, right now the throttle isn’tset right, so it’s running low, and it dies. I don’t take it out as much asI used to.

KC: What do you ride around in day-to-day?

JLA: I bought a ’95 Ford Explorer. I could never buy a new new car. I can’t stand things like all-leather interiors. I prefer cars I can kick arounda little. I even feel like I sold out when I drive the Explorer around-it’slike this little plastic toy compared to my Firebird. But at least I boughtAmerican, right?

KC: I heard the Japanese own Ford now. Just kidding. Are you a big AdamSandler fan?

JLA: I liked parts of The Wedding Singer, but I don’t always go for theboys-will-be-boys kind of thing. But Big Daddy is a lot more realistic foran Adam Sandler movie. His character adopts a child, and I’m hiscareer-oriented lawyer girlfriend, who has no time for this kid. Adam evengets teary-eyed in one scene.

KC: And it’s not supposed to be funny?

JLA: No! It’s serious dramatic scene, a little bit of a stretch for Adam. Igive him credit for trying something different. He takes his workseriously, and he wanted more “actorly” actors in this movie. He saw me inChasing Amy and asked me to do Big Daddy. Steve Buscemi and Rob Schneiderare also in it. There’s a funny stuff too. The courtroom scene betweenAdam and Rob is a riot.

KC: What’s your take on Adam?

JLA: He’s pretty much a kid who never grew up. Like a lot of actors. Thetoys might change, but the boy stays the same. Women are different. Asgirls, we never really played video games or football on Sundays.

KC: No, you spent the day changing brake shoes.

JLA: Yeah, okay. I guess I have a little of the tomboy in me. Maybe it’sbecause of my name-it’s not a nickname; “Joey” is on my birth certificate.Maybe it’s because I wanted to be different from my older sister, but forsome reason I never cried about clothes, whether my hair ribbon matched mysocks.

KC: I’ve heard you play the guitar and write country songs.

JLA: Yeah. My favorite song that I wrote is called “Daddy’s Dead in Mama’sHead.” It’s got lyrics like: “After 25 years of being the best wife shecould possible be/She found out her man had been running ’round town/And theworst part, she heard it from me.” If I wasn’t an actress, I’d want to be acountry singer. The only thing is, my voice isn’t that good.

KC: That never stopped Willie Nelson.

JLA: You’re right. I’m pretty good with a guitar, and I think I write goodsongs. My dad was a really good guitarist. When B.B. King and Charlie Richcame through Arkansas, he played in their bands. Maybe I should give it atry. I really like Charile Rich and George Jones, but my favorite is WillieNelson. Hmmm-then’s theres Johnny Cash. And Dwight Yosksm is great.

KC: Any encounters, by the way, with Bill Clinton while you were growing upin Little Rock?

JLA: Very funny. Nope, not one. But let me say this about Bill: I thinkhe’s very, very smart, and has used the Southern hick/Bubba thing to hisadvantage most of the time. I think he got away playing dumb with the bimbothing. I think his policies have helped a lot of people, but his dishonestyhas caught up with him.

KC: Do you like Los Angeles, or do you miss Arkansas?

JLA: I do miss Arkansas, and I go back lot to visit my dad and friends. Mymom lives in San Diego. I fantasize about moving back, getting a lakehouse-there are beautiful lakes in Arkansas-with a porch and a swing. Goingwater-skiing. Sounds great, doesn’t it?

KC: Fantastic. But your career seems to be going pretty well here in L.A.

JLA: I guess so. A lot of people will see me in Big Daddy. But I want tomake movies that are real. Know what I mean? Tender Mercies-like real.Those kinds of movies are hard to get made in Hollywood these days.

KC: Do you ever do the Hollywood club/party scene?

JLA: No way. I don’t like that kind of stuff. I have a boyfriend, VinceVaughn, and we don’t really get into that sort of thing. The House of Piesis more my kind of scene. By the way, how’s your banana cream?

SPX 99: The Comic Returns! Coming in August, it’s the latest and greatest in comic anthologies — SPX 99: The Comic. Featuring a “Jay and Silent Bob” cover by Matt Wagner, this baby delivers 200 pages of small press fun for only $5. And all proceeds benefit the Fund! Read more…

Degrassi Junior High/ Degrassi High

(WGBH Boston, unrated, 3 vols. each, $39.95 on tape, June 22)

The gawky charm of this Canadian series may seem odd next to today’s ultrahip teen soaps. But the emotionally honest depictions are welcome, as are the stellar acting and lack of moral patronizing.

Junior High: B+
High: B

Kevin appeared in a Jay & Silent Bob shirt with a pull over sweatshirt. To paraphrase: Kevin “.. So I’m thinking.. what can a guy like me do in 1999 to make people notice me…”

Ben: “Oh well why didn’t you just say so…”

And with that, Ben gives Kev a full on the mouth kiss for about 5 seconds! Yikes!

Jeff Anderson appears in “Love 101” at the Chicago Alt. Film Festival!

There are two screenings:
Wednesday, June 9 (tomorrow!) at 6:30 PM
Saturday, June 12 at 12 noon.
Screenings are in the lower level of the Harold Washington Library at 400 S. State Street in Chicago.
Ticket info by calling 773/525/4559.

Love 101 Feature World Premiere Opening Night Film There are some things that aren’t taught in college. “Love 101” explores the relationship between two very different college roommates and a sexy coed named Shayna. “Shy” Joe is in love with Shayna from afar, while “cool” Andrew can get any woman he wants, and usually does. During Thanksgiving break, with Joe at home with his family, Shayna and Andrew connect after a night of partying and end up sleeping together. Upon Joe’s return, Andrew must decide what’s more important, his friendship with Joe or his growing feelings for Shayna. “Love 101” will leave you remembering what it was like to be in college, where romance was just as important as your GPA.

cast: Michael Muhney, Mary Kay Cook, Jon Collins, Jim Slonina, Heidi Mokrycki, Jeff Anderson (“Clerks”, “Dogma”). prod: David Miller. writer/dir.: Adrian Fulle.

ON MOVIES / This Defender Of the Faith Won’t Clam Up

John Anderson

IMAGINE NEWTON and his apple. Proust and his Madeleine. Kane and his
Rosebud. Now, imagine naked picnics and clam chowder.

It was spring. We were fortunate enough to be in Paris, inside the
Musee d’Orsay and confronted by Edouard Manet’s “Luncheon on the
Grass” – a painting that caused near riots in 1863 because its
elements include two fully dressed men and a female companion who’s
dining toute nude.

In a museum full of wonderful art, this was a highlight. But
testifying to the ultimate roundness of things, our beloved companions
(not coincidentally female) provided the defining – and definingly
’90s – critique of one of the pivotal works of the impressionist
movement: “Why is the woman the only one naked?”

Forget the fact that Manet was demolishing artistic assumptions
about subject, composition and perception. Never mind that it’s that
woman in the picture – the one with the challenging stare and the
“who-cares” nudity – who possesses all the power of the painting.
Never mind that it remains an alarming, revolutionary work nearly 140
years after Manet made it. The politicization of seeing was rearing its
ugly head.

Chapter Two. It was summer. We were fortunate enough to be on
Montauk Highway, confronted by a bowl of Manhattan chowder and a
quandary: No clams. Not a bivalve in the bowl. I peered. I spooned. I
swirled. I considered cheesecloth. I considered chemical analysis. But
all my succulent mollusks apparently had been given the Memorial Day
Weekend off.

But what of it? Does a clam really make a clam chowder? If the
broth is potent and well-intentioned – if the essence of clam, in
other words, is possessed by the soup – do we have a moral legitimacy
in demanding actual clam in our chowder?

You’re darn right we do. Clamlessness may not be evil, of course. But
it doesn’t constitute chowderhood, either.

Glitterati Party Props

When big-name stars get bored with movie premieres and other fab soirees, they go for these amusements.

4 – Jason Lee and his friend Marissa Ribsi dig the word game: Players pick a topic and then take turns creating rhymes about it.